Monday, December 24, 2007

Merry Christmas to my friends...

Please do not forget me.
I was going to do a long catch you all up post today as a Christmas gift to you all.
But that is the last thing on my mind right now.

We are all dealing with family tragedy right now,

My mother in law passed suddenly.

I wanted to give you all a smooch and I will be back soon.

Sunday, December 2, 2007

Before I get bit

I thought I would say HI!

How is everyone? Things are good here.

I am counting the days down until Christmas. I am hoping Santa brings me the camera I have been whining eeerrr hhmmm I mean polietely asking for. yes it is a little more than your average every day old camera.. but this is ME. I am not average.

I know I have been away again for some time.. to be honest I am busy all the time! There is never not a load of clothes, or not something to dust, or not something to wash.. of all people for me to channel I channel the one that would have a heart attack if something was out of place for someone to see. (our family are closet crammers if it is in the closet and no one can see it . oh well)

Well I thought I would leave you with this cute little picture of me when I was little. With my little brother with the girly curls. Oh I am so sweet and innocent and adorable in this little dress with a bow in my hair.. I was such a girly girl.. never ever did I get dirty or play in the mud or beat up boys.. not me I was in the kitchen baking cookies.. Oh shit forget it.. just look at my knees if you want to know what kind of kid I really was.. and I still remember the beating I took to get me in that dress and the one that was threatened if I didn't smile like a girl in the picture..

Now THIS is more what I looked like :)

Tuesday, November 27, 2007


uumm I am not sure who did this. oh wait I see.. Kim-D NO smoochies for you.

I know you guys miss me but I have really been busy! Seriously I know that is no excuse but I have been doing so much! I have made a movie for my mother and her siblings using photos from their pre birth and childhood on up to their children. Do you know how long that has taken???

On top of that I have maintained an A in my class. Do you know how hard that is????

Also the kid Punk Child is giving me a FIT. I have been having to hold his hand with each and every step this year. I really need to do more for him but I don't know where to begin.

I have been raising a 3 month old puppy who LOVES my slippers. The bad part is she only LOVES them on my feet. Do you know how badly 3 month old puppy teeth hurt on the top of the foot. She wants to know if you guys know how badly the top of mommies foot in the ass hurts?

Other than all of that I am great wonderful seriously. This is my very very favorite time of the year. I have my baby Charlie Brown tree up.. the house smells like Christmas which I adore.

I see that some one learned how to put up pictures which is GREAT.. I love seeing her face.. that beautiful face. I also understand that the wine glasses I stole .... errr hmmm borrowed on that house visit might need to be returned. And someone else adores their SH and DD. That picture is great by the way.. to be cherished I am sure.

As for my Dear Sister.. she hasn't updated her blog either so I have no clue if she is living.

I am going to leave you with two pictures these are pictures that not everyone in my generation has... pictures that I will hold on to dearly to pass down to my childrens children.

Both of these pictures are of two of my GREAT GREAT Grandmothers! I will tell you how under the pictures!

Miss you all.. smooches to everyone except the woman who made the dog bite my boob!

This is my mothers, mothers, mothers, mother! How cool is that???

And this pretty lady is my mothers, mothers, fathers, mother... I am so into this.. it is just awesome!

Ok fine.. smooch Kim-d

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

I had my ankles bit..

Thanks to one of you! I am not sure what was going on but Binky Too came running up to me bit my ankle and drug me to the lap top, then I noticed that some one HAD her drag me here!

Ok we are doing good. I have just be very very busy! Work has been chaotic and on top of that my lap top (work) fried so I was without for almost a week.

I have painted my bedroom and purchased the most glorious new bed, the husband isn't liking it all that much. Says he was used to the lumps and bumps and spring sticking out of the old one. That is what did it for me when the spring sprung I felt like I was living in a cartoon! So I found a WONDERFUL buy this weekend saved myself a grand! So because I save the grand I spent a quarter of it on 100% Egyptian cotton sheets and 4 new king size pillows that are fluffy little bits of heaven!

Binky Too is doing wonderful.. other than she is not potty training as well as I had hoped. I have yet to figure this all out.

Anyway big smoochies to all of you.. even the one who had my ankles chomped!

Sunday, October 21, 2007


Just looking at this makes up for the lack of sleep!!!

Not to mention that so far no accidents today.. it has a lot to do with the fact I have swept her off to the potty as soon as she opens her eyeballs and I sit on top of her.. Ok not on TOP but beside her until she goes.. constantly saying Go Potty.. I sound like a loon but at least she is peeing where she is SUPPOSED to. and she has already learned that if I give her "The Look" she needs to back up and stay in the potty spot.

It has a completely different name

Binky Too she looks soooo much like Binky Boo that it was not possible to not name her that. The problem I am facing right this minute is I have NO CLUE what to do with such a small baby! It cries all night I have had no sleep in two nights and it doesn't warn you it is going to pee.. it JUST DOES! Do they make diapers for puppies??? it needs one

Friday, October 19, 2007


Today is a very exciting day!!!

I bring my baby home and so does my bff! Ok Ok so she did go through roughly 11 hours of labor to have her baby and I had to wait a grueling 3 weeks to pick mine up. Her labor may have been harder but MINE was definately been LONGER!

I PROMISE update and pics later today when we get home! I mean I have to show you all the cool things I bought her right???

Ok I am going to tell you how pathetically cheap.. no that isn't it.. immature.. no that isn't it... snobbish... NO that isn't it.. WAIT I GOT IT.. you know how some people call themselves shoe snobs, or yarn snobs, or bag snobs.. cause they only get the very very best?

I am NOT a hotel snob! Don't get me wrong I love a good hotel as much as the other person the nice fluffy bed.. the wonderful pillows the nice lounge, but I just can't sleep while I am there! I have been gone from home for a week.. a whole week in which each day I became more and more tired due to less and less sleep! Last night.. I stopped in my travel to get the baby in a side of the road Super 8 Motel that cost all of $50 a small fraction of the cost of my normal homes away from homes and I slept like a baby! They even gave me.. as in FREE.. FOR NOTHING .. I HANDED OVER NO EXTRA MONEY for a wonderful bowl of FROOT LOOPS this morning!!!! Can you ask for more than that???

SMOOCH AND ONE LHK to the one who gets the importance of a good bowl of FROOT LOOPS!

Thursday, October 18, 2007

well... we are at least getting somewhere

After the sister persons nice comment about Pinky that is OUT ... OUT I TELL YOU OUT!

So we are looking at Tippy..

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

a newer picture

The days are getting close now! I am getting more nervous more excited more restless.

One of my best friends is pregnant.. due any day. (I am secretly hoping that Friday is her day) Wouldn't that be fun!

Oh and the waterman is leaning towards Pinky.. I am not all that thrilled about that one, but it is his job.

Friday, October 12, 2007

What's in a Name??


Ok for those of you wondering... THIS..

does not have a name. It will not have a name until next Friday when I bring her home and the waterman looks at her. He is the namer around these parts. So in the mean time THIS is being called Julibinkhead. Which is very similar to the new Verizon commercials where people need phones that work in Carivirgizona. Ohhh that could be it's name Calivergizona... Zoni for short. That would look neat on her papers!

Seriously I just call her meat mouth. That is potted meat all over her lips :)


Monday, October 8, 2007

The new Baby.. and a big Thank you

First the thank you to Monkling!!! I have lovely hand made soap all because I said Laura! How cool is that??
Oh and by the way I am scared to us it.. so it is sitting there looking PRETTY. extra smooch to you.

Kim.. I am alive and well.. scratch that.. I am alive.. for checking on me.. extra smooch.

For the rest you.. well just blah. That is just about all i have to say. I am tired and just don't feel like doing ANYTHING today.

But I will leave you with some pictures! So Smooch to you..

Tuesday, October 2, 2007

And the Pick is..

I haven't decided yet.

That was mean wasn't it. I am leaning towards the baby with the little white racing stripe on her head. She is cute. She reminds me of the one I loved before. But there is a size component as well. I won't see the true sizes until next week. Monday to be exact.

I am a little down today. Ok a lot down. So this is going to be short.

I wish I could take them both, heck I wish I could take all three but my husband would never let me spend over a grand on dogs.


Sunday, September 30, 2007

Wanna play guess which baby??

After you decide which one we are leaning towards.. tell me if you think she is a boy or a girl.. just curious what you think they look like.

I know I haven't been around.. Sorry. Just going through .. stuff.

Enjoy the guessing.. and let me just tell you that things aren't always as they seem.


Tuesday, September 25, 2007

How is this for happy!!!

I came home tonight to my husband telling me that we are having a baby! And that was final.
Granted my baby will have four legs.

Don't get me wrong in no way does that take away my hurt of losing my Binky Boo but it does give me hope.

Not only are we having a baby we are getting Binky's sister. Same parents.

I thought this would make you all smile a little.

Monday, September 24, 2007


I know I have been missing in action for that I am sorry. I haven't had the heart to blog ... honestly I do not know how to put into words what is going on in my world. So I am going to do the best I can and please forgive me if it is too graphic or offensive.

We lost our little angel "Binky Boo" this weekend. I would post you a picture but I can't do that without breaking into tears yet again. My eyes already look like they have gone 10 rounds with Ali, and I wouldn't think there could anymore tears left in me, but I continue to surprise myself by breaking out at any given time. Like right now.

I went to Busch Gardens with my kids Saturday and came home to Binky barely breathing and whimpering with every breath she tried to make. I had talked to the waterman on the way home and he had told me she jumped off the dock and he had to jump in and save her, but he didn't prepare me for what I was about to see. He was in denial, complete total denial. I can understand, and do not blame him in any way. It was a freak accident and no one's fault. I suppose I was a little more together than he was as he was the one with her and wanted her to be ok. I called my vet, who was closed and directed me to the on call dr. I call him, imagine my surprise to find a message "I am sorry we are at church for the evening, if you have an emergency call so and so." Well so and so was over an hour away, my mother tried other vets in our area but no one was available. I am sorry but if you are going to be on call for emergencies I am sure that your god wouldn't mind if you took and emergency call during a Saturday evening service to save someone's loved one. Apparently Dr AssWipe didn't agree with me.

I threw my youngest son in the car and had him hold Binky as I was driving like a mad woman, not to mention crying like one. We didnt' make it one mile from home before she stopped breathing and her eyes rolled back. I screamed and grabbed her, apparently that was enough to shock her back into breathing. I dropped my son off and picked up my daughter, I needed some one with me that could help me, Drake is a great kid, but with him screaming and crying as much as me just wasn't helping me at the moment. I needed someone with me that would keep talking to Binky.. keep her alert.

I had so much hope when I got to that doctors office. I just knew that Binky was going to be ok. They were going to fix her. They had too.. she was Binky! The doctor came out and asked me how long she had been in the water, I had no clue, they asked me if she had hit her head, I had no clue. I wasn't there. The most I could get out of the husband when I got home was that she was in the water on her side and he lost his boots. I still do not know for sure what happened to my Binky. I am sure I will never really know. Later in the night the waterman said she ran up on the dock and just never stopped and fell over, he dove in after her but she never tried to swim.

The vets gave her medicine to get the water out of her lungs but it just was too little too late. The lack of oxygen to her brain for hours had already caused damage. The first thing we noticed was that she couldn't see me, then her hearing went. It progressively got worse. For hours I sat with her begging her to fight to try for mama. And she did.. she tried so hard. She got her tempurature back up (after the vet had tried for about 2 hours with a heating blanket with very little luck) and her oxygen level went up as long as I talked to her but she didn't have enough strength left to keep fighting. Then peice by peice she just shut down.

I have never in my life gone through anything so traumatic. To hold her, Binky, and watch her slip away is more than my heart can even begin to bear. I have cried, I have screamed, I have wanted to just sit down and quit, I have worked, I have cleaned, I have washed clothes, I have tried to carry on as normal. I can't. I really can't. Every where I look I see her. She brought us so much joy and happiness and now there is this big hole and I just don't think we can fill it. The rift in this family is something I never imagined could happen but it has. I am sitting here alone, crying. I haven't been held and told it was going to be ok. I haven't been comforted. I know I am not the only one who lost her but is that really the point?

I came home in the wee hours Sunday morning and comforted my husband, and told him it would be ok, and it wasn't his fault and that I loved him, and I would be here for him. Is it too much to ask for that in return. He honestly hasn't talked to me all day. I can count on my hands the number of words he has said to me today. Maybe he doesn't know what to say, maybe he doesn't know how to say it, maybe .. I am so sick of maybe. All i know right now is I feel like I have lost every peice of happiness I had, the very thread that held me together. I have lost the thing I have looked all my life for.... unconditional love.

I love you Binky Boo.. I miss you.

Saturday, September 15, 2007

A taste of fall!

Good Evening my lovely ladies!

I first have to say hi to a few people that have left comments that aren't my regular fans.

Hi there Lisa Carol and Katie!
Katie I know where you popped in from but Lisa Carol is a mind stumper since she asked me a question in my comments but I had no way but via my blog to respond. So Lisa Carol.. reveal yourself honey.. if you have a blog let us know! We love to blog hop to new places!

As for the rest of you.. SMOOCH!!!

Ok on to my real post. My sister person and I are both very strong advocates of fall. She tries to save Thanksgiving every year from being over taken by Christmas. I relish in Halloween myself.. are any of you surprised?? Either way fall is a favorite time of year for both of us. I think she always looks so radiant in the fall, I think it has to do with her tones, she is a very beautiful woman and it is something about the fall colors that just make her pop.

Another thing I just adore about fall, Pumpkin Spice Lattes at Starbucks! Oh not to mention the pumpkin cream cheese muffins they have. I can actually SEE my ass get bigger as I am walking out the store but dear god those things are to DIE for. The good thing is that the closest Starbucks to me is an hour away. However, there is a substitute, International Coffees has a Pumpkin Pie coffee cream in the diary section and I must say it runs a very close second. To me it is just the perfect thing on those brisk fall mornings or cool fall evenings. I made a cup tonight and walked out on the deck to enjoy the air and the pumpkin. I was in heaven.

The one bad thing about fall on the water is nothing changes. We don't have the beautiful color changes of the trees, we many have Pine Trees around these parts so leaves of fall color is not something I get to enjoy unless I take a trip west, which I never do by the way.

Oh and apparently my blog is boring.... no pictures.

I hate my camera, so I don't take many pictures anymore.


Friday, September 14, 2007

Mystery Solved

The song is Kashmir by Led Zeppelin. I didn't really mean to make this a guessing game, yesterday's post just popped into my head at an inopportune time for blogging. So I just threw the lyrics up there and let it ride.

Thursday, September 13, 2007

Oh let the sun beat down upon my face...

...stars to fill my dream
I am a traveler of both time and space, to be where I have been
To sit with elders of the gentle race, this world has seldom seen
They talk of days for which they sit and wait and all will be revealed

One of the best lyrics ever.

Thanks Kim for reminding me of it.

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

The books I read...

Since I have three weeks off from school I have started reading for fun again. I am currently reading Fahrenheit 451 which I swear I was supposed to read in high school but don't remember actually doing it. Which is odd because I typically read what I was supposed to. My problem wasn't that I didn't READ the material it was my view of the material was always what the teachers called WRONG.

It leads me to believe that teachers really do not want us to think, they just want to pump us full of ideas that some high power has decided is what is right. I remember I once did a term paper and was told how wrong it was because of my personal view on the subject matter. I matter of factly told the teacher that I was not in fact wrong I just didn't believe in the same things that she did. I got an F anyway.

I also remember having to pick apart literary works of art and spew back to the teacher what the author meant by saying something like "the sky rolled with a blackness the color of death" of course me being the person I am my typical response would be "I haven't the slightest idea because death isn't black at all .. it is more of a teal." Again I would get a F. Why was it wrong.. because apparently that the author meant was something to the effect of "it was dark outside" My question was always.. well if that is what he meant why the hell didn't he say it was dark outside! My point also being that if the author wanted us all to think that what he meant was it was dark outside then he would have left no wiggle room, he would have said that.

I can give you many different means to "the sky rolled with a blackness the color of death."
1. there is a storm rolling in.
2. the sky was filled with spirits of the dead.
3. the sky was clouded with smoke

And I can tell you all of the are right... how do I know.. because I wrote the stupid line.

I get so tired of people telling me how to interpret things, I have a brain, I will decide on my own. Apparently I am failing life as well.

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Oh Dear Sweet Kim

As much as I love you.. your request for Nancy .

Denied Denied Denied!!!

I hate hate hate Nancy. I can't even being to tell you how much I hate her.
I could care less how interesting she is or not.

Sorry.. I am a little bitter.


Monday, September 10, 2007

The Deadly Dinner Party

WARNING.. WARNING WARNING.. Sister Person.. skip over this ENTIRE post .. I don't want you upset.

Ok a great friend asked me today if I had ever played the dinner party game and if I had heard of it.
Of course I had but I just didn't know it by that name. The games goes like this.
Name ten people you would invite to a dinner party if you could either living or dead. There is no limit as to the who's.

I rattled them off very quickly then returned and changed it and then scratched some off and added a few more.
I am obviously not very good at this game. I had a horrible time limiting it to ten. So for the sake of my blog.. I am going to say 20. There is something very oddly sad about all of my choices with the exception of my grandparents and I still think I chose them originally out of obligation because 3 of them I believe they knew me as a grown woman and I showed them I loved them over their long lives.. One of them I would love to see and chat with but not at a dinner party it would be way to personal as I feel it would be with all of my grandparents so I have once again crossed them off of my list.

1. Marilyn Monroe - deceased- tragically- Choice one. I would ask her how exactly one wears fake eyelashes and how it feels not to have to be yourself any longer and have your entire life rewritten just so you can be a goddess. Oh and I would want to know why the hell she ever left Joe! I am not sure if I would ask her what happened the night she died. I don't think I want to know.

2. Jim Morrison -deceased- tragically- Can't tell you what I want him there for it isn't blog appropriate.

3. Sid Vicous- deceased- tragically- Can't tell you about him either.

4. Melanie- deceased-tragically- best friend from high school. I would ask her how we were so right about her but so wrong about me.

5. My Brother in Law- deceased- tragically- I am not sure I want to get into what I have to say to him. I will cry.

6. My other dad- deceased- tragically- it is tragic for any 18 year old to lose a father figure and even more tragic for an 18 year old to lose their father. I would want to tell him all about me and the sister person and show him how great she turned out. Not that he doesn't know.. I just want to see his smile and the pride in his eyes one more time.

7. Dale Earnhardt- deceased- tragically- I have no clue where he came from exactly other than he was part of my life growing up and the day he died I cried for hours and felt I had lost part of Sunday.

8. Humphery Bogart- deceased- not so tragic- I would ask him to call me Sweetheart all night. Although I am not sure I would have to ask.

9. James Dean- deceased- tragically- Not to be confused with Jimmy Dean the sausage dude. I would ask him to stand in the door err hmm LEAN in the door way all night looking at me with that look.. ooohhh the look.

10. Elvis- deceased- tragically- He was just a shoo in because he fit the bill- but I would ask him to sing Suspious Minds and You ain't nothng but a hounddog one more time.

11. John Belushi- deceased- tragically- I would ask him to do the Samurai Guy one more time and tell him that he didn't have to watch his language.

12. Kurt Cobain- deceased- tragiclaly- I wouldn't ask him to do or say anything. I just wanted him there.

13. John F Kennedy-deceased-tragically- again I don't think I would ask him anything I would just like to observe MM and JFK in the same room.

That was my list.. that was my dinner party. Not one living soul among them and only one who passed relatively peacefully.. if you can consider being 80 pounds with no esphogas and missing your lymph nodes peaceful.

I blame the sadness of my post on Katy and Monkling.. neither had chipper post today.


Sunday, September 9, 2007

Am I who I want to be...

I pulled this little piece out of the sister persons What she did this summer..

There is a song by Switchfoot "This Is Your Life", it's my summer anthem. The most powerful lyrics in the song are:

This is your life, are you who you want to be
This is your life, are you who you want to be
This is your life, is it everything you dreamed that it would be

I haven't the slightest clue who exactly Switchfoot is.. the name seems to indicate they some 70's band but I can gaurantee you I am wrong there. I mean doesn't Switchfoot fit right in with Foghat, Blackfoot, names like that?

Ok the point of this post has nothing to do with band names although I am sure I could do a complete post about the weirdness of some of them. Golden Earring??

Anyway.. the point is Am I who I want to be...

To be honest .. no. am not who I wanted to be. Let me explain.
Who I wanted to be 20 years ago (give or take a year or so) doesn't fit with who I am today.

Let me start from WAY back when I was 5 I remember being asked what I wanted to be when I was in kindergarden. My response was a Nurse. That had to be the stupidest response in the world. I don't mean just a little dumb I mean full out STUPID. Not only can I not stand the sight of living blood but even a needle piercing living skin makes me queezy.

It seriously makes me wonder how I lived through the numerous piercings I have as well as multiple tatoos and dying for more. To me it isn't the same... I mean I can handle someone shoving a spike through my tongue no problem.. come at me or someone else with a needle and look out I am going to hit the floor. I can not watch Trama life in the ER, surgery shows on Discovery, ER, Grey's Anatomy, or House alone because there will be no one there to say.. it is ok you can look now. My husband has grown used to my queeziness to a degree and hands out the band aids so I don't have to look and he watches tv with me so I am not sitting there alone in the dark with my eyes covered screaming at no one IS IT OVER YET??

Now in direct contrast to this, I can watch autopsies, view mangled bodies, stomach the smell of burnt or decomposing flesh like it is second nature. Doesnt' bother me. Not at all. Maggots, bugs, I am fine. Even if they are wiggling in decomposing flesh. I know I sound sick but seriously I am not. Let me explain. I think I missed my calling back in kindergarden.. it wasn't a nurse I had the want to be, it was a medical examiner. Death does no bother me, not in a sense that I back away from it. There are many dead people out there that have one last story to tell, they can tell us so much.. who murdered them, what they did on their last moments, how the accident of their death occured. Just one more story before they are laid to rest. It takes a certain kind of person to get that story out of another human who no longer has a voice. I think I was that person but I missed it. I know could always just keep going to school and get it right.. wrong. You see the queeziness of the living has gotten much much worse in the last 10 years I mean to the point of panic at a small cut bad. And to be an ME you must complete medical school. There is no way I could do it. It is a shame because 20 years ago it would have been uncomfortable but i would have survived it without banging my head on the floor from passing out.

So am I would I wanted to be at 5 no.

I am going to skip to today because the years between 5 and now are riddled with incosistancy and nonesense.

Am I who I wanted to be. No.. am I who I want to be yes.
I know that probably makes no sense at all but I am who I want to be right this minute.
Who I am.... According to Meredith Brooks..

"I'm a bitch, I'm a lover
I'm a child, I'm a mother
I'm a sinner, I'm a saint
I do not feel ashamed
I'm your hell, I'm your dream
I'm nothing in between
You know you wouldn't want it any other way"

There are other things that make me who I am as well...
I am a friend.
I have a home.. I want a new house but that is different than a home.
I have money.. just not as much as I would like but does anyone.
I am a blogger.
I am a business woman..
I am a student.

Over all right this minute I am who I want to be. I do not have moments like some people and go WOW.. my dreams have come true. Because the dreams I had before are nothing of the person I am today. That is not a bad thing. I do have moments in time when I do look around and go WOW. My wow is different. My wow is a wow of ..

I finally found what I didn't know I was looking for.

I am the who I should have wanted to be but never knew I could be.

Saturday, September 8, 2007

What I did this Summer...

Welcome to my novel!! It was suggested that I edit down and I think that is probably a good idea but I post so infrequently now that I am going to leave you with the long version, it will keep you busy for a few days!

One can only hope that people catch on to this and do the same. The infamous "What I did this Summer.." essay everyone was required to write at the beginning of the school year during nearly ALL of our school years I think should carry on to our adulthood. I mean think about it. When do we sit down and write about what we did in the past few months.. Janunary? At the beginning of the year? Yes maybe some do, I don't. I should, but I don't.
So when I read the "What I did last summer.." over HERE I thought it would be a great idea to do my own and see how many of the rest of you followed suit.

My summer started in April, April 1st, April Fools Day.. you know when everyone gets married. Ok not everyone but I did! I love that April Fools Day is my wedding day. It was also the wedding day of BOTH sets of my grandparents, it seems so special. The following week we went to Nags Head for our honeymoon which turned out to be wonderful! We had a great time, even though it was way to cold to enjoy the beach for longer than an hour or so at a time. It gave us both a chance to explore Nags Head and the surrounding areas without feeling like we had wasted beach time!

The following week after we had a baby! That is right I got married one week got a puppy the next. :) Our sweet little Binky Boo! She is the most wonderful joy! All 3.1 lbs of her!! She really hasn't grown all that much since we got her, maybe a little but not much. Not a day goes by that she doesn't do something to make us laugh out loud. She is the best entertainment and has brought my husband and I even closer together. Binky likes to spend days with her Daddy outside working (aka chasing her best friend Pitty Kuss all around the yard) and nights with her Mama relaxing and reading a good book or watching Law and Order.

Over the next few months we just got into the normal routine of being married, enjoying each other and our time together. Drake finished up school, passing on to the 5th grade (by a miracle I am sure) and spent his first summer in his life with nothing to do! I did not make him join any clubs or programs for the first time ever. He seemed to enjoy the late sleeping and the lazy days of doing whatever he wanted.

I spent quite a few days on the road over the summer with work. 99% of that time I spent the evenings with the sister person. She is such a fun person, and to be able to say that after 25 years I still love her is amazing. Most of the people I considered friends in high school have gone by the way side and I saw them for WHO they are and they weren't people I wanted in my life forever. This summer the sister person and I spent our birthdays together for the first time in 17 years, give or take a year or two. I technically still owe her for her day, she has a day coming of pedicures and whatever dinner she wants. Our birthdays are exactly 2 weeks apart and when her birthday rolled around that week was very busy for both of us. (see i haven't forgotten your day). I have to say this year was a birthday I will remember for a long time as it brought back memories of days gone WAY by.

I started school this summer. I know a little backwards, but I did. I finished up those classes this week and I have a two week break. I know I passed Law with a solid A+ 98.5 to be exact. Math I am not so sure about. I am waiting on the last part of my final to be graded. I either squeaked by with a A- or a B+. Considering the amount of time I have been out of any sort of formal schooling I am proud of my grades.

My oldest son got his learners permit this summer. I haven't had the pleasure of having him Drive Mrs. Waterman's Wife around yet, but hearing the stories from my mother is enough to keep me wondering if I want to partake in that pleasure. By the time I had my learners permit I had been driving for years, even a stick shift (even though I have yet to master hills with a clutch) so when I got behind the wheel for the first time legally I just took off like a bat out of hell and haven't slowed down since. My son on the other hand had not been behind the wheel of anything bigger than a lawn mower until about 2 months prior to being legal and had never driving on anything with lines, I think the most he ever did was drive the truck across my mothers yard. Times are so different. My father likes to tell me the story of the time he was stopped by a State Trooper at 14 years old because the tail light on the car was broken. The trooper took him home to his father and the trooper informed my grandfather that Joe had no business being on any road driving. He was only 14. My grandfather promptly informed the trooper he didn't see why the hell not since Joe had been driving around town since he was 10 and hadn't been in a accident ever! I myself was 14 when I took my first spin on state owned highways.

My daughter is 13, what a strange age. We have spent this summer enjoying each other and learning about each other. We have started a new tradition, every two weeks we go have pedicures together and once a month have the eyebrows debushed. I wish I had time like that with my mother when I was younger. Wait Wait Wait no I don't! I wish I had time like that when I was younger with my sisters mother. And sometimes I can remember laying in her bed in the little cottage in Cherry Point talking to her. I was a little older than 13 but not much. My daughter got her first cell phone this summer, which by the way I have possession of at the moment until she can pay me the $25 she owes me for her text bill! My daughter hates the color pink, which is very funny since I did too at her age. Now it is one of my fav's.

My baby turned 10 this summer. It has been a decade since I held an infant at 2 am with a bottle, and I hope it at least another decade before I hold another one at 2 am! I do not miss those nights. What I reflected on was his first decade on his birthday, I remembered how bright his smile was as a baby. What his little feet looked like. His first step. His first word (which was mama) the first day of school, the first time he played contact football, the first bike wreck, the first fist fight. I thought of all the times I spent with him laying on my bed watching some crazy movie on TV. I thought of the summer I read the Wind in the Willows to him every night before bed. My little man is growing up. Even though he still likes Mama's hugs and reassurance I have learned that it is not ok in public. He likes his independence and has no desire to have a "baby sitter" when the husband and I go out. I have that luxury of not having to get one since the mother in law lives right next door and it makes the kid think he has his independence when in truth he doesn't. He is being spied on. He has shown that he does not want to leave home when I am out of town and wants to stay here with the Waterman when I am gone. I can honestly say my family no longer has a baby, or small child. My family now has a young man who is more than a hand full but we love him anyway!

The family has spent a considerable amount of time fishing this summer (some people like golf we like fishing). Dude has the luck with the fish, the Waterman spends so much time getting fish off of Dude's line that he hasnt' had much luck this summer. Did I mention that the sharks are taking over around here and we have caught way more than we actually have wanted too? The first 10 were fun and exciting as they fight and pull and you actually have to work really hard to get them in the boat. But you know you have caught one too many when the 10 year old states rather matter a factly .. I got another damn shark.

I have read many good books this summer, even though due to school not near as many as I would have like to read. I have read so many books in my life that I can't even begin to name them all. I am going to have to thank the sister person for the gift of reading she gave me. I am not even sure if she knows this. But my love of the written word is her fault. I hated to read before that summer in Cherry Point. Even though that was an exciting summer it was still laced with sadness and disappointments that teenage girls should not have to deal with. It was that summer I noticed the small book shelf in her room that was over crowded with Sweet Valley High books. I picked up book number 13.. yup that is me.. never start with number 1. I even started the Harry Potter books at number 2. Either way Jessica and Elizabeth quickly pulled me into their perfect world at Sweet Valley, even though the girls dealt with their own troubles and boyfriend stealing friends they weren't dealing with the sadness and disappointments I was going through in my real life. To be honest even as I opened that first book I knew that I had already dealt with more in my life than Jessica and Elizabeth ever would but that is what I needed. I needed somewhere to retreat, somewhere to hide, somewhere no one knew me and that summer Sweet Valley High was my escape from the world in which I had to live. Since that summer I have explored the Pyramid's in Egypt, visited Ruined Castles, met Magical creatures, solved mysteries, cried at deaths of friends, shared in the joys of marriages and births, rooted for the underdog, celebrated justice served, as well as being part of many adventures in the past and in the future. All by opening the cover of a book. There have been many many good ones and a few bad ones along the way. In my life I have never jumped ahead and read the last chapter for fear of missing the importance of something in between, I have never stopped reading a book completely. There have been times I put one down due to lack of interest but later picked it back up and finished it because it nagged at me. There has only been one book in my life that I can honestly say I wish I had never read, American Psycho, that book has been the start of many bad dreams. That was the one book I wish I had put down and not picked back up. I hated that book from Chapter 1 but continued reading because I needed that guy to be caught, he wasn't. So to my dear sister, thank you for saving my life, because without the retreat to worlds and lives other than the one I have lived I am not sure I would still be living it. (morbid .. yes a little sorry)

Good Lord! Who knew that writing a summer essay would get this long. I am no where near complete with my thoughts but this post is very very long and I have yet to add the pictures! (which I will come back and do since I need to resize them)

So you see.. writing this short essay is a wonderful reflection! Come on guys write your own I want to see where it will lead you!!!!

Smooches to you all!

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Yea well.. what exactly can I say

I stink at having fans.

To all of you that keep coming back to only see the same damn message ... SMOOCH! Bunches of them.

I am in the final count down in this semester.. finals next week. Work has gone completey NUTS.. along with my youngest who by the way just turned 10 yesterday, (where do the years go???) who is driving the awesome waterman that way very quickly.

I honestly do not have my shit together at the moment. I honestly do not know how to get shit together.. I am not sure I want to learn how.. that just seems gross. Where did that phrase come from.. getting ones shit together. Why would I want to know if you had yours together or why would you want to know that I had mine together???

or worse.. why would you want to know that I DON'T have my shit together.. does that mean I have shit all over in little piles?

Does this give any of you a peek into my state of mind at the moment????

Monday, August 6, 2007

Pondering a possible mistake

Ok.. so I got the older kids cell phones!

What have I done??? Just one more thing for me to worry about. Will they text their friends 3000 times a month vs. the 300 their plan allows? Will they use them before 7 and run up all the minutes on the family share plan?? Granted the fact that my oldest just got his learners permit and will be driving alone in a meer 5 months I figured it was time. I want to be able to call him and know where he is when he takes off on his own...

Hmm rule number 345 Do not talk and drive. Maybe that should be rule 1 but I can be only so hypocritical .. I talk on the phone, mess with my iPod, use my blackberry and drive all at the same time. Sorry Sis but I still do that.

So how is everyone? Me.. I made it threw my mid terms ok.. grades are doing well.
I spent a wonderful birthday with my dear sister who is now just as OLD as I am! We had a wonderful time at her birthday celebration. Well at least I did.. I am sure she did as well.

We are doing our treat day later .. last week was just exteremly busy and hectic for both of us so we will do that at a later time.
I have knitted absolutely NOTHING lately.. but who the heck has time! Heck I don't even have time to spend 3 minutes to let you guys know I am still alive.


Wednesday, July 18, 2007


It is my birthday and I have cute toes! How much more awesome can one be on their birthday!
I was taken to lunch and dinner and got to get my toes rubbed and painted, they are a really LUVERLY pink. The most LUVERLY sister person treated me very well and has only once or twice alluded to the fact that I am right now older than her. She has only 13 more days to pull that stunt. I was treated to Starbucks, the toesy rubbin', then an AWESOME Mexican dinner while we watched Breakfast at Tiffany's! Doesn't that sound just heavenly??

Want to know what makes it even cooler we get to do it all again in 13 days when she is OLD too!!! Granted she gets to pick the dinner but I am betting the Starbucks and the toe rubbin' remains the same. If for nothing else my feet are scaring her and she will want to keep them pretty in pink.

I miss the husband VERY MUCH but I am LOVING the toes.

Monday, July 16, 2007

Hook, Line and Stinker!

Ok everyone here is the line that has been requested in the last week!

As far is the hook.. I really do not have one other than my prize winning personality!!!

And the stinker.. this is my birthday week.. my first birthday in my whole life that I am married... my first birthday in my whole life that I have a husband to share my day with. I have always been a birthday person my birthday is MY day I should get to do what I want and people should treat me like a princess on my birthday. I should not have to lift a finger on my birthday. This is no different than any other day except I can say.. YOU HAVE TO CAUSE IT IS MY BIRTHDAY. If I tell my husband to wear a tu tu and dance the can can he has to because it is my BIRTHDAY. If I tell my son that he has to paint my toe nails he has to because IT IS MY BIRTHDAY. And because it is my birthday they have to SMILE while doing it. All sounds great.. right?? NOT the stinker is I will NOT be with my husband or my son... and when I scream BUT IT IS MY BIRTHDAY at my sister (who I will be spending my day with) she just screams back YES IT IS AND ALL IT MEANS IS NOW YOU ARE OLDER THAN ME!!!!

Life is so unfair.

Tuesday, July 3, 2007

Howdy Ho

Dear neighbor...
Hehehe I just called you all Ho's.

Been working hard on school the last couple of days. I have my math homework done for the week.. haven't done much on law.. must do that today. I am taking the next few days off work so today is FRIDAY for me Yippie! I am taking the boys to Busch Gardens on Thursday, we have season passes, so I am going even though I am still tired from going last Saturday. I want to go back one day... ALONE... or maybe my dear sister would like to come and go with me one day.. and watch the blasted SHOWS. Every time I go I say I am going to watch one show.. NOTHING.. NADA.. NONE have I seen yet. I have rode every ride 120 times but NO SHOWS. Unless you count the stupid thing they do in the Festhaus each and every hour on the hour that they have been doing since 1923. I think the people in there are robots.

I am falling behind in law.. that worries me. I am FIRST in math.. other people have their law homework done. I DON'T. ok.. stop complaining pull up your big girl panties and get it done and .. (anyone find it odd I am talking to myself)

Ok.. confession.. i don't know how any of you are..I haven't taken the time to blog read this week!!! I am a bad blog friend.

Got to run and do more homework.. I have a math quiz i scared to even download but buting the bullet later today.


I have a question.. do you think you can SHIP some of those crepes with vanilla cream cheese to VA???

Thursday, June 28, 2007

I promise this to you..

NOTHING I have been doing is either fun or exciting. I have learned that I know nothing about math or law.. well that is a lie I know LOTS about law but that is limited to Judge Judy, and all her crazy ass day time tv counterparts, and every episode of law and order.

Do you guys know that some nut job in Chicago committed a murder, actually not just one murder he killed his whole family and shot his self... staged the WHOLE thing exactly after a Law and Order episode! What a moron! Who thinks to their self .. Hey I am going go kill my whole family and do it just like I just watch on Law and Order and NO ONE will ever know.. I am the only person who saw this episode.. well me and the other 300,000 morons watching it at the exact same time as me.. oh and the other million that has seen it in reruns.

I mean come on!!!

Ok.. I have learned something else.. I have another word I HATE.. Dollop!
What the HELL IS A DOLLOP! It is NOT dollop of sour cream it is a FRIGGING SPOON FULL! The only thing that deserves a DOLLOP is something that I just DROPPELED on the ground! It sounds like something.. (I am thinking maybe a seagull) propells out of his ass about 30 ft in the air right above the steak you are getting ready to eat.. now that my friends should be called a DOLLOP.

I would say that is my most hated word in the world, but it isn't.. someone reading this MAY know what that is.. and post it.. I can't even make my self TYPE it..
I found out that I could not type that particular word while discussing this exact subject with my boss who used the word SATURATE to describe a report, Yes I have issues with the word saturate, I am getting freaked out just reading that word.. just frigging EW. But guess what! She isn't using that word anymore .. hehehehe I love my boss!

5^5 SMMOOOOCHHHHIIIEEESSS to EVERYONE! The first person who can tell me how many that is gets double!!!

Sunday, June 24, 2007

I wish..

it were more exciting but the truth is i have just been busy.

I went to Chicago for three days, then worked two more, then had a tooth out, then took the the Dude to NC for the week coming up.. just have been going going going.

Orientation was Thrusday night for school and that starts tomorrow. I am looking forward to it greatly but just a little scared at the same time.

right now.. it is Sunday afternoon I am childless and I think I am going to take another nap!!!!

But I am alive :)

Saturday, June 16, 2007

I am good how about you??

Seriously I logged on to ask how you guys are..
Who really cares what I am doing right?

Ok I go to orientation Thursday night.. I am scared. I bought my class books.. scared me worse!

I fly out to Chicago Monday AM so I may or may not post next week but at least you guys know where I am.

The program has been going well. I bought a new scale today.. two of them to be exact. A weight scale and a food scale. The first thing I found out was that my OLD scale was weighing 3 pounds lighter than the new more accurate one. We found out it was broke when the dear Waterman got on it and it weighed him 20 pounds difference that the dr office. Thank God mine was only 3 pounds off...

The other thing is I think we should put Binky Boo on a program too. Her mother was 6 pounds and her father was over 10. Binky boo is TIPPING the scales at 3 lbs 3 oz!! She is fully grown. I am so not complaining. She is the sweetest most wonderful little angel!! I suppose I should tell you all Binky Boo was the first thing I weighed in my new food scale. LOL.

I have found a new show.. Army Wives.. it is really sad.. but good.

New episode is coming on so I have to run.


Wednesday, June 13, 2007

So here is what is going on in my world..

I have been MIA again.
My 9 year old graduates from grade school this week.. fun stuff for us. He has a ceremony tomorrow morning so I get to get dressed up.

I have been working a lot had some issues to deal with and such.

Having my daughter last weekend was WONDERFUL we had a great time.. she is such a great kid.

School is approved and I go next week to finalize everything and do oreintaion (maybe I should learn to spell that word)

Here is my secret. I am on a new diet.. I hate that word I want to use program so from here on out if I mean "my program" you will know I am referring to the way I am eating. I will tell you if the program is going good.. or not so good. I will not tell you how much I weigh or how much I want to lose. That I will save for goal day.

I know I have not posted pictures of what I REALLY look like on here and my weight is a good reason why but on goal day I will post a before and after picture. And then I will tell you how I did it. I will say this for now. It does not include any surgery or any kind of medication.

PSA.. THE FOLLOWING IS NASTY!!!! Not in a sexual kind of way but a POOPY kind of way..

Speaking of diet medication, Alli goes on sale today or tomorrow. People are raving about it. I am very sorry but there is NO WAY i could rave over something that caused.. Look away now if you get quimish ANAL LEAKAGE!! Apparently from the reports I have read and heard on TV this medication blocks fat and if you consume fat it has to go somewhere and it is SUPPOSED to go out in waste. Ok I get that makes sense to me. THEN they say if you consume just a little too much fat that it will LEAK OUT prior to waste time. I am sorry but I think I would KNOW if I was LEAKING!!! Oh and also it could cause SEVERE diaherrea like in the middle of a store and you CANT make it to the bathroom. WHO WOULD PUT THEIRSELVES IN THAT SITUATION for the expected weight loss of 1 pound a WEEK and that is IF you follow a diet and excercise program. for the life of me I can't find the benefit in it other than maybe you won't eat fatty foods out of fear of POOPING IN PUBLIC!!!

oh. if any of you are thinking of trying Alli.. I am sorry.. but this IS my blog and THOSE are my thoughts.

Anal leakage.. just ew.

ok.. so back to the regularly scheduled me.

Please don't think I am hiding anything from you guys.. I love you all you know that. I just want this to work for me and I am using the "unveiling" of myself to you guys as motivation!! So please bare with me and be supportive of my secretive little program.

Oh and to my lovely sister.. I may tell you what I am doing and you will see the progress because I will SEE you BUT you have to promise not to post about it on your blog.. some of my regulars have been known to hop over and see how you are and what you are up to! LHK

Sunday, June 10, 2007

Not Surprising to me..

I am a day late with my report..

I am sad to say there is no particular reason really. Well today I have a good reason. I have laid in bed all day and done NOTHING. The poor Waterman was left to make dinner again tonight. Granted it was wonderful as usual. He made me and the Dude hamburgers on our new grill. ACTUALLY the Waterman has grilled dinner EVERY NIGHT this weekend. I have only cooked the sides. I love this man!!

My daughter spent the weekend with us and that was very nice. Friday and Saturday we went out on the boat and both nights she and I watched TV together until dozing off on the sofas. She is such a great kid, although a bit of a channel flipper which I totally HATE!!! I actually hid it from her for awhile today.

I really have more to say but .. I have not felt well all day and I am going to bed.

Triple Smooches to Kim.. doubles to the rest of you!

I have news but you are going to have to come back to find out what it is..

Friday, June 8, 2007

I am seriously ok

Ok.. I am never ok.. because my brain doesn't work that way.
I was out of town again and today was NUTS at work and then I picked up the Middle Child from school and been hanging out with her all evening..

I promise a full report of the goings ons tomorrow..

SMOOCHES to the ones who came looking for me!!!

Katy you get double smooches for asking!!

Monday, June 4, 2007

You just can't make this stuff up!!!

I read this today in one of our local weekly papers.. that is right WEEKLY.. we aren't even big enough to have a Daily Paper and when this town gets on the news they NEVER EVER pronouce the names of the neighborhoods correctly.

But this little ad amused me to the point I snorted!

BEDSIDE COMMODE. Invacare. Model 9630 Adjustable Height, Appears Unused. $35 OBO.

I don't know about you but because it is Model 9630 and not 8345 and since it APPEARS unused I think I will offer $50!!!

Sunday, June 3, 2007

Ok so maybe I am pretty smart.

Smarter than a 5th grader at least.

I passed my test with flying colors which is also why have been MIA the last four days. I am working on knocking out as many self paced courses as I can between now and June 25th. That is when my not self paced classes start. Nothing to hard to start with. Some kind of Math and Business Law 101. I could probably test out of the Math but I need it to be my starter class.

I hope you are all doing well.. blog reading has halted the same as blog writing.. I am trying to play a little catch up tonight!

Wednesday, May 30, 2007

One small step to most..

One gigantic friggin leap to ME!

I did it .. I finally hit the send button on my college application. Yes I put it off until the very very very last minute. Out of fear no doubt, but what is done is done.

Later today my counselor called me and we worked through some of the technicalites and decided what path I needed to start on.. you know the blah blah blahs. Then she hits me with the bomb shell.. I have to take a placement test.

Umm excuse me WHAT?? I graduated from my previous school with a 4.0 but that doesn't matter.

I have a fear of test.. I will panic ever minute from now until Friday. I took the prep test and got 100% on the Math.. the English I didn't do so well on. Grammar.. I know nothing about Grammar! Who knew?

Any of you who reads this blog.. that is who knew!!!

My major issue right now is there is nothing to study! NOTHING. IF there were I would study until I knew each and ever scenario backwards and forwards. That is just how I am.. and probably got a 4.0 previously.. Well that and the fact that I learned how to raise 3 kids, hold down a job, go to school full time, and sleep only about 8 hours a week!

When I was in school before bets were placed on the number of hours I would get in a week.

Now I have to learn how to raise one 9 year old, work a stressful full time job, raise a four legged baby, be a wife, and figure out how I can do all of this and get some sleep.. why because I am OLD NOW. I don't think I can do the no sleep thing again. I like it too much.

Wait I have an idea.. I will figure out how much time I spend eating now and use that as sleep time.. maybe I will lose weight while doing this!

Some one tell me to shut up before I scare the pants off myself!!

Here is the deal

Yesterday was a very long day.. for reasons I would just as soon not get into. Partly my fault partly others but it does not matter I am home, healthy and happy.

But to explain why this post is so short.. I have major cobwebs in my head.. why you ask.. I am just now drinking my normal 6 am cup of coffee.. why because I didn't have time to go to the store yesterday... I should have MADE time. Even if I had to go to the grocery store in NC..

Monday, May 28, 2007

Aloe Vera.. umm no thank you!!!

Aloe.. GREAT idea! It was also a great idea when someone advised me of just that about 20 years ago after I had spent a week at the beach and I looked literally like a lobster. I smeared the cool green gel over my very tender burnt areas (at the time I could wear a very small bathing suit so there were A LOT of areas that needed attention) I lay down to hopefully get some sleep. Wake up a few hours later feeling not quite right.. something is wrong.. something is VERY VERY WRONG.. I am blind.. I can't see.. I CAN'T F'ING SEE ANYTHING.. Wait.. I can't scream either.. I am trying to talk and nothing is coming out in words.. it is mumummmuuummmuumm and that is it..
Oh I can hear so I haven't lost everything.. In my banging around to figure out why I can't talk or see.. wait my hands don't feel right.. I can't move my hands right.. ew and what is that I am standing on?? It feels like some kind of gel .. what the heck is that??? Oh I can't see it..
Then all of a sudden I hear OH MY GOD.. HENRY!!!!

Remember Henry is Joe's name right who at the time was known to me as Daddy..

Seconds later from him rummaging around and from my mother again... WHAT ... WHAT.. WHAT IS WRONG WITH HER???
Joe... I dunno...
Mother... her face.. it is OH MY GOD.. and it is GREEN!
Joe... I don't know what that is.. give her a bag of ice..

Which turned out to be a plastic glove filled with ice but it did get the swelling to go down in my eyes enough that I could see a tiny bit. My lips finally went down enough I could mumble some and it took my hands and feet at least a week to get back to normal.

The weirdest thing is .. I had a friend with me at the beach.. after all my rummaging around she stirred and got up and we went through the same monologue with her!!!!

We were BOTH severely allergic to aloe!!!
The scariest yet good part was when we were in the store buying this Aloe stuff the girl tired to push bottles of Aloe Tea on us.. saying that it would help cool us from the inside out.. we both thought it sounded gross and did not give it a second glance. We could have probably went into some major reaction with that.

So my lovely ever helpful friend.. I will keep the itchy ta ta's!!!

Sunday, May 27, 2007

Before I wake up with a concussion..

Somebody PLEASE tell me that you have some sort of suggestion.

My dear sweet wonderful Waterman is an involuntary wife beater! Ok before you have heart failure.. KEEP READING! Like I said it is involuntary as well as unconscious.. he is dead to the world asleep when it happens and unfortunately so am I! He has crazy arms.. it isn't like he is swinging it is more like they are flopping, and you guys have seen him.. he isn't exactly a weakling.. he has really strong arms and hands, it is one of the things I love so much about him. In his defense he has sleep apenea which the doctor has yet to set up his appointment for (reminder to self.. call them again for the third time on Tuesday) and he moves around a lot in his sleep which normally I can sleep right through unless of course I get the right hook to the back of the head.. or the jab to the side.. or the flop to the nose.

Before you suggest a bigger bed.. we are in the biggest king size bed you can possibly buy unless we have one custom made and if I go that far I am going to have them build a wall in the middle. And please do not suggest separate beds.. one of my greatest joys is waking up with this man in the morning and hearing him say "Good Morning Sweetheart" or something to that effect. I mean seriously the world of separate twin beds for the husband and wife went out the window with Fred and Wilma Flintstone in the early 70's. Did you know they were the first couple to be seen on TV in a double bed together at the same time? Useless Knowledge .. one of my wonderful qualities that most people HATE. John Belushi was the first person to say .. umm.. (since I think at least one of my children reads this) uumm eerr.. the F word on TV .. he was doing a Samaria Guy skit on Saturday Night Live.. See Useless Knowledge. What was I talking about again?

Oh yea.. my husband's floppy arm.. there has to be an answer short of hog tying him. He suggested me tying his hands together but I figure if I do that then he is just going to flop BOTH of them on me. One is enough thank you very much. I am really at a loss. The thing about is he feels very bad about it and I know it isn't his fault .. but DAMN IT HURTS.

Friday, May 25, 2007

Just a quick PSA

For those of you that miss me and I know who you are.. I am just spending some quality time with the Waterman. The little dude has taken off for the night to spend some time with his best buddy, so that leaves the Waterman and myself to a night and day of kidlessness. Oh what shall we do with ourselves??

Seriously though going on a boat trip tomorrow to the Eastern Shore.. Taking the camera so when we get back there will be pictures.

Have a great Memorial Day everyone!!!

PS.. Ann Marie IS my real given name..

Thursday, May 24, 2007

I love Joe!

This is Joe.

Isn't Joe handsome??

I have loved Joe since the day I was born. He protected me from the big bad things in the world and was my super hero. He has bailed me out of jail, he chased off a bad boy or two.. maybe three, he loved me even when he couldn't like me very much, he taught me to ride a bike, throw a base ball like a boy, start a go cart (granted he broke my nose while trying to do so), he taught me how to be me and not what everyone (erhmm my mother) wanted me to be. I could keep up with this list forever but I won't bore you.

Joe bought me this today. I see many many grilled things in my future. Thanks Joe!!!

Joe hasn't always been Joe to me, for the first 33 years of my life he was just Daddy.

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

I think I have finally lost my mind..

My dreams.. I can't take them anymore. They aren't really scary just weird and they are starting to get to me.

I am not someone who has ever looked into what my dreams mean or what I am trying to tell myself but this is getting out of hand. To be honest I do not even know where to begin to analyze what is going on in my gray matter as I snooze.

One I can pretty much figure out. It was easy actually. Binky got pregnant, and when I took her to the vet she was pregnant alright with 13 mix breeds they were going to have to abort. (keep in mind Binky is all of 3 lbs she couldn't handle 13 of anything inside of her) Well I understood all of this and told the vet I would do anything to save my Binky that the money from 13 pups was not worth it. That is when he told me that they were mix breeds and I couldn't sell them anyway. Enter weird part of dream, she was pregnant with 3 books, 2 coffee cups, and 8 other inanimate objects. I remember the books and coffee most simply because those are two of my addictions and I was thinking that it was all my fault!

If you don't think I am addicted to books since Monday afternoon I have read two novels and I am starting on the third.. Yes you counted right that is a novel a day. As for the coffee I never am without coffee. EVER.

I figure that was my brains way of telling me that I am spending too much time with these things and not enough time with real life, the problem to me is that IS real life.

I also have dreamt that I was pregnant NOT EVEN POSSIBLE PEOPLE and that someone I used to be close to was pregnant, in a way you could say she is part of the family, kinda. What is up with all this pregnancy dreaming!! I know that pregnancy does not mean pregnancy in your dreams but I have NO idea what it means.

This past weekend I had to get up and go outside to the garage to make sure that the Waterman was really out there because repeatedly people kept coming in the house telling me he wasn't there, or he had left, or he wasn't where I thought he was, this was all in a dream and granted he was right where I left him when I found him, it was still weird!

This morning was what put the icing on the cake. A friend that passed away 2 years ago or so came to see me this morning. Which is fine.. I suppose.. but when you tell me that you are coming back to visit with my 9 year old after he gets home from school today I am not so sure it is fine anymore!!! No no no.. GO AWAY.. Take your note you have in your hand that allows you to see him and go back to where ever you came from! You are NOT visiting with my son.. even if your note says that you are now his new dad GO AWAY!!!

I did not say any of those things in my dream but I was still thinking them. What I did say was today was not a good day in a very shaky voice and walked back into my house and woke up.

It is now 7 am.. and I need a drink.

Monday, May 21, 2007

I can admit when I am wrong

Apparently my Chosen Sister (I stole the term from here.)had to set me straight this morning. She was a "Clique Hopper" too. This I knew and I think what I said was not communicated well. I must say we do learn by making mistakes though because I had no idea that she had gotten in "trouble" in 4th grade by a very enlightened teacher who realized she was getting into a very small clique that would ultimately lead her down a path of self centeredness and close mindedness. I am not saying that she would have turned out that way because later in school years I think due to life she would have changed. I just think this teacher realized these three little girls (that is what they were at the time) were closing themselves off to the rest of the world. Thank goodness for this teacher because there is a chance if it had not been for her that my sister would not have chosen me. I should send her a thank you card because that one act 25 years ago may have molded part of my life.

When I said that she didn't understand my "clique hopping" I was incorrect. She understood it. She just didn't understand why I would chose to hop into a crowd of not so desirables. There were lots of reasons for this. I think some of it was for shock effect. Some of it was for the bad girl image. Some of it was so I could do the things that some of the straight laced cliques would never have done with me. Some of it was for safety.. like I said lots of reasons. I don't regret it, none of it. I would not change a thing because ultimately everything I have ever done in my life has brought me to where I am today.

So to my chosen sister I am sorry that I made it sound like you didn't understand me, because you did more than anyone else in my life. LHK

This is all leading to something I promise.

I read on a blog the other day a question. I can not remember the exact verbiage of the question but it was pretty much this "If you could live your dream life what would it be?"

I am living my dream life. There is nothing I would change (well I might be living in a bigger house). The fact is I am not sure that many people would agree with me if you knew my entire situation but the deal is I am happy, my children are happy, and my husband is happy. Isn't that what life is all about? I have a great job that I love. I love the people I work with (well 99% of them) and I love the work I do. I live in an awesome town even though to some people it maybe small town (it is). I married a man that I have loved in some capacity for my entire adult life. I have life long friends who are all over the US and even one that is far far away. I have people who come here and read this blog who I have never met, who I have never emailed, the extinct of our relationship is leaving each other comments on our blogs, but the fact is I care about them and they care about me. Read my comments if you don't believe me. I have a friend who I have spoken to on the phone maybe twice, the rest is email but I know if I called her today and told her I was in trouble she would be there for me.

I may not have enough money to pay all my debt off in the bank, I may not have a house big enough to hold all my books, I may not have all 4 of my kids under one roof, I may not have the fanciest car in town, but I am richer now than I ever imagined I would be.

To me that is a dream life if I ever heard of one.

Sunday, May 20, 2007

Torn between to lovers is like a..

ball and chain..

Or is it trying to love two women.. old country song in my head sorry and before anyone has heart failure there is nothing wrong with me and the Waterman. We are fine, wonderful to be exact. This is about my youngest child, before your next heart failure he doesn't have lovers or women. What he has is two friends that are tearing him apart!

Why can't kids these days realize that it is OK to have more than one friend? Why can't they understand that it is ok to hang out with people from other cliques? When I was in high school, that was the odd thing about me I suppose, there wasn't a group I couldn't hang with. I thought it was because I was too weird to belong to any one group at the time but looking back on that time of my life there wasn't any groups that really shunned me. I was just strange enough that everyone wanted me in so they could try to figure me out I suppose. Well that and I knew where to get all the "illegals". I was what I like to call a "Clique Hopper" and later in life that helped when I started bar hopping! The role of "Clique Hopper" was never understood by this person. Which is totally crazy because SHE was a "Clique Hopper" too. I suppose what freaked her out was I would hop into cliques that were dangerous territory for her. They were probably dangerous for everyone there and I am quite sure that I left more than a few brain cells around those cliques, but it was high school you are supposed to do that right?

Anyway my point here is that the little dude has a new friend and he has no idea how to divide his time. Don't get me wrong I LOVE the fact that he has friends. When we moved here he had no one and spent countless hours in his room playing video games. Then he met Friend 1 who lived right across the road. They were inseparable it was great my little guy had a friend who I wasn't friends with his parents first!! Awesome right? Wrong. We moved. Only a mile down the road but to an 8 year old that may as well be across the state. Just this month I have agreed to let him walk the mile to see Friend 1 but the issue is in the mean time he has met Friend 2 and if Friend 2 is around he completely doesn't want to hang with Friend 1. Which really isn't all that big a deal because Friend 2 is so much closer to home and I have known Friend 2's parents all my life. Well this weekend enter Friend 3. This is new.. Friend 3.. I had never even heard of him before until Friday and all of a sudden I get told "Friend 3 wants me to come over today and play". Friend 3's parents I do not know, I do not know where they live, or their phone number. I know nothing about Friend 3 except his name is Friend 3. So finally today after many phone calls that were answered with Dude is not here right now (Friend 3 apparently knows how to use the phone and is not afraid to use it) I met the parents of Friend 3, they seemed nice enough so I allowed Dude to hang out there for the afternoon and he apparently had a great time. And as soon as he got home he headed up to see Friend 2, but over dinner I get the bomb shell of all friend bomb shells... Ma, I am not friends with Friend 1 anymore because Friend 3 doesn't like him. UMM WHAT!!! No No No NO! It does NOT work that way. Friend 1 was your friend before Friend 3. And when I caught myself saying that I knew that was wrong too. I didn't know what to say except but .. please don't be one of THOSE kids.

We talked about it a bit and I hope I made my 9 year old understand that life isn't about being friends with one person, or in one particular group or the other.. I can honestly say that friends help mold me into the person I have become and I feel like if you limit yourself to one person or group you are going to be led to disappointment at some point in life as you are going to get into situations where you do not fit in so well.

It is all funny in a way because I was trying to put some kind of label on my blog the other day.. is it a parenting blog, a marriage blog, a photo blog.. that kind of thing.. my blog like me does not belong to any particular group and I like it that way! I just hope I can raise my kids to be the same.

Friday, May 18, 2007

It's so hard to say goodbye...

Warning.. there will be TV spoilers ahead..

It is Season and Series Finale time. I do not like this time of year. The TV gods are taking away my friends and replacing them with the odd new kids or old versions of my friends for the next 5 months or so.

It is going to be 5 months before I find out if Manny on Medium comes back and if Allison gets her apology she so deserves.

It will be again that long before I find out if someone finds Sarah from CSI before she drowns to death in the mud.

What about Grey's does what's his face REALLY leave what's her name for good? Does George tell his wife that he didn't pass the internship and has to start over in life? Sorry I just met my Doctor friends this season and I am so busy with my others that I very rarely find time to visit with them.

Melinda from Ghost Whisperer, does she figure out that Gaberial is her brother? What else does she remember from dying?

Lost .. not ready for that one yet it happens next Wednesday.

Without a Trace I have already forgotten how that ended but I was not happy there either, Cold Case does Lily make it?

Do you see my problem?? I have multiple friends facing life and death situations, I have some friends that need support, I have some friends that just need some one to says that everything is going to be alright.

But the TV gods have cut me off from them for 5 months!!! It isn't even like I can email my friends to catch up or touch base for the next few months. I have to replay in my head the last times I saw them again and again (read watch reruns) until they come back and tell me what is going on in their lives! AGONIZING!!!

Even worse than this is that someone decided to take Loralei and Rory Gilmore away from me .. forever and these two just became my friends 2 months ago!! I just stumbled upon Star's Hollow not to long ago and wanted to stay forever and it was like there was some kind of weird disaster that wiped out the whole town as if it never existed! This happens to me all the time, as soon as I start watching something new.. the gods wipe out the entire town.

Yes I am a very sad sorry creature that plans her week nights around the TV Guide.

Thursday, May 17, 2007

Things that make you go hmm....

I have been out of town again and I know some of you will not believe that I did not take Jenny Mac with me but she stayed home carefully tucked under the love seat awaiting my return. The most shocking thing was I survived 48 hours without her. I was still breathing when I got home. Maybe now wouldn't be the best time to say that when I got home I kissed the Binky Boo, checked my email THEN kiss the Waterman. HHmmmmm I may have my priorities a little twisted.

I went to Maryland this week for work, that part was stressful but a good kind of stressful. Lots of work done, new ideas discussed, proposals made. All good things. I love work when it is going fast paced and good things are happening, truthfully I love my work all the time. I love what I do. I love 99.9% of the people I work with. Hmmmmmm I am not sure that ALL people can say that.. I am a lucky person when it comes to work.

I spent the night with my sister.

Personally I think she is one of the most beautiful creatures God put on the planet. Inside and Out.

When we finally ended up in the same place at the same time Tuesday night we spend two hours outside on the deck.. GASP.. talking! I think her husband referred to us as hens or chickens or some kind of farm animal at one point. After the mandatory chit chat about who looks terrible, who looks so good you have to poke your eye balls out with chop sticks so you don't think bad thoughts, who is getting married, who had a baby, who is cheating on who, the conversation turned to more serious matters. It was a strange conversation and to be honest I do not remember HOW it got brought up. My sister said she wished I were at her wedding, I said I wished she had been at mine.

Let's wind back a few years here, technically lets wind back A LOT of years. I believe the year I am looking for is 1984. that is the earliest I can remember at the moment. Simply maybe because I haven't even finished my first cup of coffee. Starting in 1984 she and I attended each others life events. I was there when her biologicals divorced, she was there when I ran away, I was there when her heart was broken, she was there when mine was, I was there when she needed Lucky Charms, She was there when I was failing school, we were together for proms, we were together for dates, we were together every day in some way. There were the major mile stones of getting driver licenses, We are FRESHMEN, We are SOPHOMORES, We are JUNIORS, We are SENIORS!! Every year a mile stone, Every year a memory that I can link back to her. June 1989 that ends. The last major life event we have shared together was Graduation.

Over the last 18 years many many things have happened in both of our lives. We both have graduated college. We are both now married. I have had three children. She lost a parent. We have both purchased our own homes. We have both been promoted at work. None of these events were shared. Once we graduated we separated into two very different worlds. I don't think either of us did this on purpose, she ran off to college and I ran off and got pregnant. Over time this did not change. We always seemed to be separated by something. It is so odd because I love her way more than even my biological brother (Happy Birthday to him by the way) and there is no one else on Earth that I would even want to share those things with but her. I think maybe I just don't share things well. Milestones in my life now are mine alone and I don't want to share them. I don't know really I really don't. Hmmmm.

Either way I hope she knows how very much she means to me!!! LHK!!!

Sunday, May 13, 2007

So days are just..

Better than others. I am over my pity party to some degree. It helps to actually cry sometimes. Who knew. I couldn't hold it all in any longer today so I did just that. I cried and then I pulled up my big girl panties and made myself blueberry muffins that I have been longing for and one heck of an awesome dinner complete with strawberry shortcake! Who can cry when they are eating strawberry shortcake??? I know I can't. That is just one thing that makes me smile.

I saw three of the four kids today so that is at least a passing grade. And I am grading on a curve this year so I say all in all the day was a good solid B. I know I didn't win any awards this year with my mothering. To be honest I pretty much stink at it. No matter how much I completely love each of them with all my heart I am just not a good shower. It is hard for me. I don't talk much about my kids on here and it is for good reason. So because of those reasons I am going to move on to other topics.

I thought of someone today and I am not sure why. She just came to my mind a little while ago and it made me miss her. It made me sad because of the things she is missing. My aunt passed away so many years ago. Dude wasn't even born and Sis was just a little tiny thing so it had to be 10 years ago. She has four wonderful granddaughters that she did not get to meet. She would have loved them. She could have told them all about her days as a girl scout leader for me and my cousin. She could have told them about how she made sure a neighborhood kid who's mom wasn't always around had dinner. She could tell them about camping in the woods in the pouring down rain sceaming at the top of her lungs that if she HEARD ONE MORE WORD THE NEXT PERSON WAS SLEEPING WITH HER! (and believe me that was NOT somewhere you wanted to sleep) She could tell her granddaughters how her neice was so messed up that she had to come live with her for awhile and how she wrote her letters when no one else would. She could tell her granddaughters how angry she got at her own daughter one day that she threw all of her clothes out of the window of her bedroom only for my cousin to find out years after her death that our grandmother had done the same to her. She could tell her granddaughters how she won a battle with weight problems by finally setting her mind to eating right and exercise. I don't know why she is on my mind today.. but today of all days I am glad she is.. Happy Mother's Day Aunt Reedie!

I am not sure I even want to post this because it is a deeper veiw into me that I am not sure that even I want to see at the moment. I believe that there are changes coming and I am going to need help. I believe that the out come of the changes will be good but the battle will be long and hard. I believe I will need help that I am not good at asking for. I made a list yesterday that I am not proud of. So today I am going to make another list.

Things in my life that I am glad of...

1. I am glad I married the love of my life. There is no other person on this earth that I would want to call my husband.

2. I am glad that I have friends that don't give up on me.

3. I am glad that I have four wonderful healthy children

4. I am glad I have a job that I love and I work with people I love to work with.

5. I am glad that I have a mother I could say Happy Mother's Day to.

6. I am glad that growing up I had 4 parents. Two Mom's Two Dad's I learned life lessons from each and every one.. even if more from some than others.

7. I am glad to have experienced loss of loved ones in my life. It has made me appreciate those that are here more and given me precious memories of those that have gone.

8. I am glad that I found my way home after many years lost.

9. I am glad that I still have the ability to write even though it does get mushy at times.

10. I am glad that I know how to love even when it hurts.

Saturday, May 12, 2007

I am going to start my own version...

Ten things I do not like and why.. I am not tagging anyone today this is just for my own person use. It is 9 am on a SATURDAY and I am already annoyed to some degree.

1. I do NOT like people who do not take my world for it when I say the Waterman is unavailable. If I say he is unavailable that is not going to change at all when you say but I only need to talk to him for a minute. So what.. 1 minute... 30 minutes... he is STILL UNAVAILABLE. And when you push the issue I get all weirded out and think it may be important and go interupt the Waterman only to find out what was so important to you wasn't to him.

2. Women who call and when I say he is not available HANG UP.. Umm excuse me but just because he isn't available does not mean I couldn't take a message! Do NOT hang up on me!

3. I do NOT like the word CRISP. As a matter of fact I cringed a little when I typed it. Why must we even use that word??? Is it REALLY that important? Can we not find another word to mean the same thing. I mean just EW. There are other words I do not like either but this one is the WORST. It even ranks higher than the OTHER C word I do not like.

4. I do not like gorgeous Saturday's that I have to spend raking the yard instead of on the boat. I do not like it even worse when it is followed by a Sunday that is too cold to go out on the boat. Doesn't seem quite right does it??

5. I do not like a lady at work. I can't tell you where I work or who she is but I CAN say I do NOT like her. She is rude very very rude. Not to just me but to EVERYONE and she has her hand in everyone else's pots and she wears shirts that on the front say.. YOU WILL FOLLOW MY PROCESSES OR YOU WILL DIE.. and on the back say.. I WON'T FOLLOW YOURS AT ALL. Ok she doesn't REALLY wear those shirts but I can see them in my own head. She treats me like a moron and has basically said in emails that I am worthless and pointless. I know I am NOT supposed to take it personal because this woman doesn't have a bit of social skils in her body BUT I do take it personal.. those kinds of things HURT.

6. I do not like Mother's Day. I do not have a very good relationship with my own mother and that puts a damper on it for me. It makes me feel like a failure and a disappointment every year. Last year I spent a 3 hour drive from VA to NC crying on Mother's Day because it went so horrible. I made a decision not to make Mother's Day plans this year. I have given my mother her gift. I will call her, but I won't be spending dinner or time there.

7. I do not like that I am fat. I am not sure that explanation needs to be given here. It is kinda plain and simple. My ass is the size of what TWO asses should be. I SERIOUSLY need to do something about it but I have NO will power. No matter what I say or do I just can't MAKE myself do it. I swear I make all these plans in my head about what I am going to do about losing this weight.. and GUESS WHAT. All the weight is STILL here. I know that it is going to be all up to me but something has to be WRONG with my head. I can seriously be eating something and at the same time be thinking in my head.. you don't really want this.. you don't need this... but keep on chompling anyway! WHAT IS UP WITH THAT!!!

8. I do not like my el cheapo camera. I am very sad about my camera situation. I really really want the Panasonic Lumix. oh and by the way.. the post the other day.. I said DLS.. I was trying to say SLR.. I had work on the brain. The ony thing is I can not seem to justify buying myself this camera. No matter how many ways I spin it. I can't justify it. I was soooo hoping I might when the contest over here this week but I guess I am not all that creative when it comes to naming pictures.

9. I do not like that they have remade some great old 70's and 80's cartoons and turned them into some kinda freak show! I mean seriously have you SEEN the new Scooby??? It is horrible. The pesky kids do not even look right!! I am very saddened by this,

10. I do not like the fact that I could list 9 things so easily that I do not like. I have a friend who keeps telling me that I need to think positively. Maybe I am not a positive kind of person! Maybe I should try to do something to change that.

Ok I am done with my pity party now. I hope everyone has a WONDERFUL Saturday!!! And to all you mothers out there HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!!!!

Thursday, May 10, 2007

Drat!!! I got tagged and totally missed it!

Because of the toothache and some minor travel this week I have been a day or two behind on blog reading.. I got tagged by.. DooDaddy. The hardest part about this is figuring out WHO I am going to tag back.

I am supposed to tell you ten INTERESTING facts about myself and that is not going to be easy because I am a boring kind of person. But I really liked DooDaddy's idea who made it nine TEN facts and a lie. You get to tell me which one is a lie.

1. I love to read (not very interesting but keep reading) and I have a hard time parting with books after reading them. I probably have thousands of books of all shapes and sizes. I have even read books from the library and then had to go buy them because I didn't want to part with it.

2. I drive a truck. A very big loud truck. You can hear my truck about a half a mile from the house. I love my truck.

3. I love to cook but I don't follow recipes well. I am always throwing in a little something extra even if it might mess up the whole dish. I haven't messed up a whole dish yet by doing this but I am sure it will happen at some point in time. Because I have a problem following recipes exactly it kinda throws baking out the door. Baking is too exact for me.

4. I once was playing around with my sister and talking in this granny country voice.. you know the one.. the one from the cartoons Granny that had tweety bird.. I could talk pretty much just like her. I had the whole Thank you Sonny down to a tee. Well the phone rang and I answered it in that voice. It was my prom date.

5. I do not remember my first marriage ceremony. Not that it matters I am glad I do not remember, that was a bad time for me. I remember each and every second of my wedding with the Waterman. I just don't remember the words the Preacher said. I can still see the whole ceremony in my head like I was there and I see his mouth moving but I don't hear the words.

6. I am addicted to coffee. My husband has often refered to my drinking massive amounts of coffee as my "Coffee Problem" He is right. It is a problem because I use that creamer stuff and I may as well poor liquid sugared fat down my throat. I have been teased repeatedly that I have a Starbucks Sonar in my brain that goes off whenever I get close to one because I can spot one from a mile away.

7. I have five brothers, four sisters, three mothers, two fathers, three sons, two daughters. That is 19 in total. Can you tell me how many of those are biological?

8. I love taking photographs. I don't have a good camera. I am still shopping. I have found the one I want and it isn't THAT expensive right around $400 with all the gadgets I need. And I am sure This One will do.. BUT I am secretly longing for This One.. It is about double the cost of the first one.. but well worth it and it is as close as you can get to DLS without going DLS. Which I KNOW I am not ready for. AWESOME.. the one I WANT went down in price!!!

9. I love football. I will sit around on Monday night, all afternoon on Saturday and Sunday starring at the TV while football is on. I think it has something to do with the mens rear ends in those tight pants. I cheer out loud at appropriate times and scare people in the house because I scream so loud.

10. I had a really good one for this one.. but I totally FORGOT IT! Obviously I have memory issues and as soon as I hit PUBLISH I will remember what it was! So how about I give you just a few short facts in here that really need no explanation. My BEST friend has been my best friend since middle school. I have a best friend who lives in the REPUBLIC of Georgia. I wear size 8 shoes. I am crafty in both meanings of the word. I am IN love for the first time in my life. I have seen every episode of Law and Order all three series. OHHHHHH I REMEMBER THE OTHER ONE. You get 11 from me.

11. I have always wanted to be a Medical Examiner. You know do autopsies and such. Dead people do not bother me. I think ever person dies with one more story to tell and it takes some one special to get that information from them. Because as much as I love the Ghost Whisper and Medium I don't think everyone has the ability just to chit chat with the dead. That in it self is weird I know.. BUT check this out. I can NOT stand to watch someone even have a teeny tiny cut.. or get a shot.. or those surgery shows on TV. Why.. because they are still ALIVE!!! So why did I not become and ME.. because apparently someone thinks that you have to learn how to work on LIVING people before you can work on the DEAD. umm ok WHATEVER THERE GOES MY DREAM!

OK here are my tag backs just because I am annoying a couple of you and because I REALLY want to know how the rest. If you by chance have done a list already.. send me the link I won't make you do it again, Phyl.. you have to DO IT.

Got Gauge
Not Without My Coffee
Marie's Muses
Two Kids and a Husband
Life After